Tom Waits – ‘Chocolate Jesus’

Dont go to church on Sunday
Dont get on my knees to pray
Dont memorize the books of the Bible
I got my own special way
But I know Jesus loves me
Maybe just a little bit more

I fall on my knees every Sunday
At Zerelda Lee’s candy store

Well its got to be a chocolate Jesus
Make me feel good inside
Got to be a chocolate Jesus
Keep me satisfied

Well I dont want no Abba Zabba
Dont want no Almond Joy
There ain’t nothing better
Suitable for this boy
Well its the only thing
That can pick me up
Better than a cup of gold
See only a chocolate Jesus
Can satisfy my soul
When the weather gets rough
And its whiskey in the shade
It’s best to wrap your savior
Up in cellophane
He flows like the big muddy
But thats ok
Pour him over ice cream
For a nice parfait

Well its got to be a chocolate Jesus
Good enough for me
Got to be a chocolate Jesus
Good enough for me

Well its got to be a chocolate Jesus
Make me feel good inside
Got to be a chocolate Jesus
Keep me satisfied

Newsreaders: ain’t they clever?

Just caught the tail-end of the ITN news while flicking. The final item was about how a sports-car once owned by Mussolini, had sold at auction. They show the car and then go back to the newsreader, who says, with a more than a faint hint of smugness:

“Nice open topped sports-car there – but are we going to be having the right weather for driving such a thing? Here’s … to tell us.” (Camera switches to the weatherman, and I’m frozen with shocked mirth).

So no other issues with driving the car, then? Nothing slightly weird tinkering at the back of your mind as you cruise along? Just hoping you don’t get wet, huh?

According to the BBC news site, the Alfa-Romeo was sold at a Cheltenham auction, and expected to sell for up to £1m, while Damian Jones, motor car specialist at auctioneers H&H, said:

“It’s a completely unique car – one of a kind.

Mussolini was effectively responsible for saving Alfa Romeo from going to the wall with state intervention.

He was a great motorsport and car fan. The car’s racing history alone makes it special.”

Well, there we are, a bargain no doubt.

tap tap…

Is this thing on?